Surprising Children With Disney World: With Children in Mind

It's sad to think that the chance to go to the "happiest place on earth" is being ruined (for both the children and the parents) because of the way the children are being surprised.

Tip #1: Don't lie or invent plans, because the child may become attached to the alibi and you will end up disappointed.

See what happened when these parents lied to their children with decoy plans thinking that the children wouldn't care once they knew the truth.



Or these kids...



Some children cannot handle a sudden change without warning, or let go of a decoy plan they have been looking forward to. No matter how magical Mickey and his friends are, to a child, a visit to Nana's house may be even more magical. The child would be far more excited about Disney if it wasn't portrayed as replacing some other plan.

Tip #2: Give your child at least a day or two notice of your upcoming trip so they can mentally prepare and you can have time to help them with any fears in a positive way if needed.

While Disney commercials may make it look like a fairytale full of happy endings, some children just can't handle the transition from "every day mode" to "Disney mode" without warning, as seen here...



and here...



Another risk with telling your child at the last minute is that you have no time to address any fears your child may develop at the news of taking an airplane for the first time like these parents soon discovered...



and these parents...




So, how should you surprise the kids?

Below are the 'how, when and why' details I used to tell my children of our upcoming visit and what I'm doing to help keep them excited until the big day arrives.

Plan the trip, and pick a holiday (or a special date) to tell them.

I decided that we would use Christmas to tell the kids. I wanted an interesting way to tell them since this is our first family vacation.

I came up with getting them each a Mickey Mouse suitcase with a shirt inside that says "I'm going to Disney World" that they opened Christmas morning.

This is the suitcase:



These were the iron-on transfers for their shirts:






When they know that a trip to Disney is in their future I want to ensure the excitement stays alive, and that they aren't asking me 20 times a day "how many more days til we leave". So, I made a countdown calendar that is personalized to the details of our trip.

The calendar provides them with a visual tool to see for themselves how many days are left. Each day contains a fun fact about Disney and/or a detail about our trip. I was careful not to give too much away but enough so that they can understand what they are looking forward to. Each day they move the marker to the number of days left until our trip and read the fun fact inside the pocket.



Here are a few sample fun facts I used:

"At Animal Kingdom there are 1000
real animals that we can see along
with favourites from movies like
Nemo and the Lion King"

"At all the Disney Parks you can find
mickey’s face hidden in everything;
like on doors, windows, the ground etc.
So be on the look out"

"At some restaurants characters come
out to greet you while you eat"


Some other things I am planning for the kids for our Disney trip are:

1. Having them bring a journal to write or draw memories in each evening of the vacation. This will provide them with something to do in the resort, and of course, be a great keepsake. It will also help them reflect on all the wonderful things they are experiencing on their vacation.

2. Giving them their own spending money. We all know that Disney is expensive and that there are things to buy at every turn. By giving the kids a set budget, this means that they can buy what they like but when their money is gone, their shopping is done.

3. Christmas Eve they opened new pajamas so that they could wear them for Christmas morning (as seen in video below).

I hope your Disney surprise leads to the fairytale vacation that it should be. Remember, the thing with surprises is everyone wants to keep them until the very last possible minute, but no matter when a person finds out about a surprise it was still a surprise until that moment. It doesn't matter if it's an hour before or a month before, you will still get the same surprised reaction.

After months of saving and planning for a fun family vacation, why risk a disappointing reaction to ruin everything?


Now, without further ado, Our Disney Surprise:

Activity Overload

There are so many activities available for our children that there are now activity guides for parents everywhere you look. Guides filled with categories and lists of endless possibilities of stuff for children to do. Some are silly, some are fun, some educational and others can be argued to be life skills that simply 'must' be learned. As a parent, I find myself faced with the task of selecting activities each season that I want my children to participate in.

When they were 3 they began swimming lessons, at 4 they began soccer, at 5 it was skating. Each of these activities were in constant rotation, one after the other, rarely overlapping. In our house, we wanted one day a week of activities for the kids and it seems to work well for us.

However, the simplicity we have in place currently leaves them left out of a lot of activities that they would enjoy and thrive in which brought me to the question; why can't they do a little more? With no clear answer in front of me I had to re-evaluate the house rules and make a new decision.

Since I believe that swimming is one of those life skills that children must learn, swimming will remain 'non-negotiable' for now. Skating however, we can do as a family throughout the season without anymore formal lessons. Soccer is one of the children's favourite activities so it will still be a part of each summer.

The change we've made is to allow them one steady, year round activity of focus. In an effort to keep the choices reasonable, my husband and I narrowed the choices down to 3 and presented them to the boys. Choices were based on their current interests and included; taekwondo, indoor soccer or gymnastics.

Even with 3 choices they are having a difficult time deciding on just one. If they had their way they would have a different activity every day of the week. Thankfully I know that too much is no good for them or my bank account in the long term. To assist them in making the right choice I have signed them up for a free trial class of taekwondo to test out the waters a little for themselves before committing.

Sometimes I wish I had the time and money to let them explore martial arts, five different sports, music and everything else they ask to try. Then I remember that they need to miss out on some things in order to have a balanced life.

Many parents are often asking themselves, how much is too much? I think it will depend on your child, your lifestyle and your budget, but even if your time seems limitless, and you were the latest Lotto Max winner, balance is always a good idea. Stick to 2 per season at most and leave room for some unstructured learning through play.

One Day Our Kids May Never Leave The House

Our parents said it to us and we will soon be saying it ourselves; times are changing.

When I was a kid I played outside along with at least 15 others on my street. We rode our bikes, played in mud, went to the park and invented games. When I look around my neighbourhood any day of the week I usually see a ghost town.

Kids are starting from a very young age to prefer to be inside. They want to play video games, watch TV or surf the net. When they want to talk to their friends they use MSN, Facebook, text, phone or Skype. A child has never knocked on my door asking for the kids to play outside. Even when they get together with their closest friends the activity they wish to engage in above all others is video games. Times are changing.

With children growing up with this mindset, I wonder, if when they are older, they will engage in many activities outside of the house. In the world we have created they have little need to step foot outside. Lets look at the following list of typical basic needs and wants:

-Food
-Paying bills/taxes
-Getting an Education
-Working
-Social interaction
-Reproducing
-Exercise
-Entertainment

All of these can be done without ever leaving the house.

We can buy food online and have it delivered by companies like Grocery Gateway. We can do our banking online, receive bills and pay them online, as well as process our tax returns online.

Children can be home schooled, Teens can get their GED online and we can attend many college and university programs online (and this will grow more and more every year). We can get a work from home job either through another company or by starting our own company and we can conduct our business meetings, File sharing or ship a parcel by using various types of technology, all while remaining in our pajamas.

We can fulfill the human need to socialize by using Facebook, Twitter, blogs and various target groups all found online. We can watch TV, movies and play video games as we've always done from home but now we can also shop from home, play a multitude of games online or simply surf the net for hours of entertainment. With a few clicks of a mouse we can see anyplace in the world without having to endure excessive security searches or full body scans. We can also buy home exercise equipment to replace an outdoor run.

We can use technology such as Skype to 'attend' weddings and funerals. Or, we can even deliver a baby at home (depending on the circumstance of course) and then raise that baby in an at home, online world.

The future of our children is going to be very different than the world we once knew. As social norms change to allow for more people to 'connect' or to 'save time' we will see a much more isolated world as time goes on. Change isn't always a good thing.

The Best Thing I Ever Bought My Kids

Recently I redecorated my kid's rooms. At the time I thought the greatest thing about their new rooms was the Star Wars light saber lamps. Granted, I still think they are the coolest thing ever, they certainly are not the best thing I ever bought my kids.

The best thing I bought them is also for their new rooms. Star Wars message boards. It's not the fact that they are Star Wars that makes them awesome, it's the message board part.

This tool has been used especially by DeAndre, (7yo), although Dorian, (4yo), enjoys drawing on his as well. DeAndre has begun using his board in a way I wasn't expecting but I am so glad he found a healthy way to relieve his own stress. On the first occasion he had written "Dorian I hate you. Stay out of my room 4 ever and don't touch my stuff". Many people might be gasping and thinking that is horrible, but it is actually very healthy. Rather than keeping his feelings bottled up, he is releasing the feelings he has in small healthy doses. When he made up with his brother he erased the message.

I never commented to him about what he wrote because it was his own personal release of how he felt at that moment and it wasn't my business to interfere with that. I know he doesn't really hate his brother.

On the next occasion I found the message "I hate cleaning". He wrote this on the day I made him clean his room for a sleepover he was having. He still did clean his room and did a great job. The thing is, the act of writing your feelings down on paper helps make you feel better and I am so happy my son has discovered this. It's a healthy release that isn't harming anyone and as a bonus he practices his writing and spelling techniques.

Today, after my husband told him he couldn't watch television because of his behaviour this morning, DeAndre wrote another message on his message board. This time he said "Daddy and Dorian stay out of my room but Mommy can come in my room". My husband and I laughed about it this evening after the kids went to bed. We would never take such messages to heart because we know he doesn't mean it. He erases them once he feels better which is another reason I like the message board idea vs. paper and pencil.

If you have a child who is around age 6 or 7yo, I highly suggest adding a message board to his or her room somewhere where he or she will have easy access to it. Allow your child to freely express him or herself at his or her leisure on the board. It's one way to help keep your child emotionally healthy.

Daycare Tragedy

A fourteen month old infant died at the hands of her childcare provider on her second day in attendance.

Story Here

This story affects me as a mother and as an individual from the field of early childhood education.

Caring for children is not easy. It is stressful, and unless you can find the rewarding side and satisfaction of it, then it's probably not the job for you. Like those that care for the sick or elderly, childcare workers experience little to no appreciation for the work they do. Especially caregivers that work from home. In a center based care setting, caregivers have each other to rely on for support during frustrating moments, such as when a new child enters the program. Home care providers however, do not.

Many children experience some anxiety transitioning to their new environment, new routine and new care giver. This is sometimes expressed through constant crying and even screaming. This was likely the cause for the caregiver in question to begin shaking this child. That, and lack of skills to perform her job, such as, patience, desire/passion for working with children, love, care or understanding of children's development.

This is a risk with home care providers, especially ones you do not personally know. Often times, the individual providing at home care is a mother, and this alone is used to make other parents believe that they are competent. Even though we know that children all over, are abused by their parents everyday, and sometimes worse.

In home care, there are no witnesses to observe the care giver. In center based care, there are several witnesses.

In home based care, there is often no training in child development and therefor lack of knowledge on how to fully understand the child. In center based care, there are trained educators who will know things such as that crying during a transition to care is perfectly normal and will know what to do to make it easier on the child and themselves.

In home based care, there is no support for the child care provider if they are having a stressful moment and need to take a break. In center based care, there is always someone to take over if you need to walk away for a few minutes.

Am I pro center based care?

Yes, I am. However, I do believe that home based care has it's place. Some children need smaller group sizes as their personalities or temperament is not best suited for large group care. Some home care providers actually are trained properly and are even licensed. These home care providers are probably not doing it just for the money, but for the love of working with children.

The problem is how does a parent know the difference when looking for a provider? I say, look through the fluff in the ad listings. Ads that can only say "I'm a mother. I'm caring, loving, nurturing" and other similar phrases should tell you something. First, this person is not a professional. Second, they are probably doing this job as a convenient way to be a mother and make some money - not because they actually want to work with children or that they enjoy children. And remember that having their own children doesn't mean that they will like your children or treat them appropriately.

So what does a good home care provider ad listing sound like? It should state the individual's credentials, such as being an ECE (early childhood educators), that they provide developmentally appropriate activities and that they are licensed.

When you meet your child care provider, ask questions about discipline practices, curriculum, communication procedures, and for a copy of the menu. Feel out how serious this person is about their home childcare center. How is it set up? Is a part of the house dedicated to their business? Is it set up similar to a classroom? Is there some children's art hanging on the walls? You can tell a lot simply from the love and dedication they put into their set up.

My heart breaks for this baby and the baby's parents and family during this very disturbing time. It saddens me as a mother, to think of someone doing something so horrible to such a helpless baby after being trusted to keep him/her safe.

Please research your childcare provider thoroughly but don't lose faith in child care. I believe that center based childcare is very beneficial to a child's development and creates a solid foundation for all future learning.

Effective Playroom Design

If you are a parent you most likely say things like "clean up your room" "put that away" and "If I trip over one more toy I'm gonna.." a hundred times a day. You more than likely are also asked "Mom, do you know where my (insert toy name here)is, I can't find it?" or some similar phrase another hundred times a day. If you want to help your kids be more independent and responsible with their playtime, you have to help set the stage.

Room design for child care centers is such a critical component of Early Childhood Education, that there are 2 classes during the 2 year ECE program dedicated to setting up the classroom in such a way as to promote active learning.

Not only can an effectively set up play room at home promote early learning for your children but it will also help them develop a strong foundation for Independence and responsibility for their stuff.

Here is a break down of 7 simple, yet very rewarding, ideas on how to organize your children's playroom.

1. Sort and Label:

In order for your child to independently find what they are looking for when they want it, they must know where to look. This begins by making things easy to find. Start by getting some storage containers. I like the bins from ikea because they are sturdy, inexpensive and come in bright colours. Then assign a bin to a certain type of toy. Some examples of this are a bin for each of these common types of toys: lego, action figures, cars, beyblades, bakugans (I have boys so feel free to change these to barbies, polly pockets, zhu zhu pets etc). Once you have divided all the toys into their own bin you are ready to label. Labeling can be done a multitude of ways but I have found the for pre-readers the best way is to take a picture of the actual toys and tape it to the front of the bins along with a printed word underneath the picture. Attach a second copy of the picture to the shelf where the bin belongs on the shelf. If your children can read you can skip the picture and just label with the printed word such as how I have in my picture examples.

2. Toys and Games Too Big For Bins:

For all toys and materials that do not logically belong in a bin, assign shelf space for this toy and label the shelf. This way your child will know where to find and replace the toy after use.

3. Assigning Shelf Space:

Placing your materials on the shelf effectively takes some thought. The idea is to try to create a set up that works logically. You can also display certain toys in a way that encourages the child to choose these toys over others. In my example you can see that the low shelf has the board games, puzzles, lego and marble works on it. I chose to place those materials there to encourage them to sit down and play more board games together, engage in puzzle play and work on building with lego/marble works because those are great developmentally appropriate toys. The other materials they have were then assigned shelf space on the larger unit based on what they play with the most often, what toys I'd prefer to keep out of my younger child's reach and what toys belong closer together (ex. Big cars and little cars).

4. Art area:

Your child's playroom should include some art related materials. We used to have an easel in our playroom as well but I have since removed it as we were running out of room and my guys are getting too big for an easel now. We have a plastic storage unit with 3 drawers where I have sorted and labeled their books in the following categories: colouring books, activity books and stickers/sticker books. Inside the desk drawer they have pencil case boxes, one for crayons, one for pencil crayons, one for markers and one for school supplies. I allow them free use of child safe scissors, glue sticks and pencil sharpeners. You can offer what you feel comfortable with.

5. TV and Video Games:

Although you would never find this in a child care center, chances are this area exists in your home. It can also be properly organized to maximize the care of these materials. We choose to keep the movies and games in our living room because they still do not take proper care of them. They do keep the Wii accessories in their playroom though which are kept in a labeled bin. They also have a labeled bin for remote controls, so they wont lose them.

6. Variety or Toys:

It is important to have a variety of toys for well rounded play. Key types of toys include; blocks and building toys, art materials, games and/or puzzles, books, dramatic area (costumes/dress up/kitchen), and some toys of interest (beyblades, action figures, dolls). By offering a variety of types of toys your children will be able to explore and learn in a variety of ways which builds a solid foundation for all future learning such as reading, math, social development and problem solving.

7. Display Your Child's Art:

Have a dedicated area of the wall where they can display some of their art work from school or home that they feel proud of. I got a bulletin board for their playroom and they love hanging their special art on it.

Here are some pictures for you to see how my children's playroom is set up.


These are the 2 toy shelves in our playroom.



This is the shelf I use to put the toys I want to encourage them to play with on. The top is reserved for large toys that will not fit anywhere else.



Here is a close up of the shelf labels



Example of labeled bins and shelves



The storage drawer unit for sorting colouring and activity books. The desk is beside this and all the art supplies available to them are in the desk drawers (also labeled)



This is the storage bin I use for dramatic costumes and props. If I had the wall space I would have hung the costumes on hooks and placed only the props in the bin.



Notice the labeled bins for remotes and videogame accessories.



The art board that we display the surplus of kids art on.



Once your room is set up and organized take your children around the room for a tour. Show them the labels on the bins and the shelves and let them explore where all their toys can be found. Explain any 'house rules' you will have (ex. video games and movies stay in our living room and you need to ask before playing with play dough). Remind your children to put things away in their proper place after use.

If your children start asking you where things are, remind them of their labeled bins and remind them that putting things away is their responsibility. It may take a few weeks to a month to get used to it but be persistent and continually remind them about the benefits of a clean room (finding what you want when you want it for example). Remember to clear out old toys periodically as to not have an over cluttered room. We do a playroom cleansing before birthday's and Christmas as this is the time when they receive an abundance of new toys.

If you have any questions about playroom set up please post them in the comment section.